Learn to Live Again
by moonswirl
Summary: Gleekathon, day eight hundred and eight: This was never going to be easy, and Beiste can't help worrying about him.  not Rory, Damian, see inside


_Started my daily ficlets to make the hiatus pass, then decided to keep going with a 2nd cycle, and then a 3rd, 4th, etc through 38th cycle. Now cycle 39!_

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><p><em><strong>INTRODUCING "CHEAT SHEET" - <strong>If you want to know ahead of time when a certain series will be updated next, just reassemble the link below and check out the list, save it, print it, bookmark it, whatever you need!  
>Go to: <span>gleekathon [dot] tumblr [dot] com [slash] cheatsheet<span>_

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><p><strong>"Learn to Live Again"<br>Beiste & Ewan (OC with Damian-face)  
>Ewan series #3 (following 'Home Alone')<br>(see 'Shattered' for explanation) **

She would have stayed with him, delayed her return to McKinley when the school year would start, but he insisted he'd be alright and she didn't have to do that. By the time they had flown in to Lima, after leaving Ireland, only two weeks remained before the start of the new year. This certainly afforded her the time to get Ewan settled in, to show him around town… But it wasn't as though he'd just come here on a whim, or for school… He'd still just lost his parents, been forced to leave his home, his town, his country behind, all to live with an aunt he had only ever seen once in his life, when he was just a boy. Those two weeks would be a lot more precious and would require much more caution than the other case would have. So Shannon was with him, every step of the way.

The first few days he hadn't felt like going out, and she understood. They would watch movies together, or play cards – a pastime they shared – then there would be meals, and that was about it. She could still count the number of times he would speak in a day on a single hand, and even then they would mostly be about what he wanted to eat or watch. Then when his boxes were shipped in, he was able to unpack them, make the room that Will and Emma had prepared in her absence become something more his own. Even then she could feel it didn't feel like his own just yet, so she offered a trip to the mall. He hesitated, but finally he agreed to go. For a good hour he just walked along with her, didn't say a word, just… looked around. He made two purchases that day: a sketch book and colored pencils. When she asked if he drew, he said he used to, but he'd stopped. Now even if he wouldn't say it, she knew he was trying to reconnect with his father who had been an artist.

After that she would ask if he wanted to go places, check out the city, but he'd look aside, distracted, and give a shrug that basically said he didn't feel like it. She didn't push. But the days were ticking down, and soon she would be going back to work. She really didn't like the idea of him having to stay behind on his own, after what he'd been through, like it would make him flashback to the evening he spent waiting for his parents, not knowing they had been killed. So she had made the offer, to stay with him a little while longer. She wasn't seeing any sort of improvement in him, not that she was going to push him, so leaving him there on his own just felt too early, not right. She'd offered it to him three times in the last week, and he'd graciously refused it each time. She tried one last time, the day before school would start. He was already registered, though in light of his situation they had not set a date for his first day. Again he promised her he would be alright, that she had already done so much for him and that he didn't want her to have to miss work because of him. In the end she had made him promise to call her, if there was anything at all he needed, but she'd agreed to go.

When she got to McKinley, it seemed like a million years since she'd been there last. Maybe it would be good to get back to work, leading the football team once again. She ran into Will and Emma in the teachers' lounge. They asked about Ewan, how he was doing, and her, and how she was doing… It was good to have them, to know that she had friends looking out for her and for the boy they had never met. She told them about how he'd only ever left the house once since they'd arrived, how quiet he had gotten, how much she hated having to leave him behind. Will had offered to send some of the Glee Club on a visit, hoping having people to befriend might help. Shannon thanked him, told him she'd keep that in mind but that for the moment she would rather handle this her way.

Returning home, she'd found him asleep on the couch, the TV on, his sketchbook on the ground next to the couch. She didn't want to wake him, so she turned off the television, grabbed something to eat from the refrigerator and went into her room to keep him undisturbed. She knew he hadn't been sleeping well, could hear him shuffle out of his room in the middle of the night… Ewan asleep on the couch was not a new image for her, so if he was sleeping then all the better for him. He'd woken up about an hour later, and when she'd asked how his day had gone, he told her what basically amounted to 'nothing different.'

This went on for a week, where she would go off to work, returning to find him asleep on the couch. Part of her was working on the thought that he was sleeping during the day while she was away, out of some need to know there was someone there with him, but she hoped she was just thinking too much.

She had woken up, hearing the television in the living room… he was up. Getting out of bed, she moved out of her room and went to find him, sitting at his side on the couch. "What are you watching?"

"I don't know…" he shrugged. They were silent for a moment.

"Ewan, have you given any thought about… school?" she asked. He didn't answer at first, just staring at the screen. "Look, if you're not ready, I understand, but I think it might be good for you. Can't stay up here forever," she shook her head, sympathetic. His eyes watered almost instantly. "Hey…" she moved up closer, taking his hand. "You'll get through this, I promise. It's hard now, probably going to stay that way for a while more, but somewhere along the way it's going to get easier." She paused again. "I miss Kathleen, every day. We didn't get to see each other as much as we would have hoped to, but she was my baby sister… I really wish I'd gotten to know your dad more. From what I knew, he was a really good guy," she nodded.

"He was great, he was…" Ewan spoke, sniffling back.

"Want to tell me?" she asked. For a few seconds he just sat there, but then he turned to look at her.

"Sometimes he'd walk around the house, paint smudges on his face and he had no idea. Mom and I would wait to see how long it took before he realized it. The more time it took, the harder it was for me not to laugh. Then he'd figure it out and he'd ask 'Why didn't you tell me?' and Mom would go 'Oh, I hadn't noticed.'" Shannon smiled.

"Yeah, that sounds like her."

"He always tried to help people, if he knew he could. Give people rides, lend them things… He always said to treat people how I'd hope to be treated. That was what he did and it worked for him, so I knew he was right." He held the sketchbook in his lap, hand laid out over the cover. "Some days I wake up and I still think they'll be there…"

"Is that why… you're having trouble sleeping?" she asked slowly.

"If I go to sleep, then when I wake up it'll happen again…" he shook his head. She wanted to say something, but she didn't know what. Before she could reply though, he sat up. "Monday."

"Monday what?" she asked.

"I'll go to school," he nodded.

"Are you sure?" she sat up as well, and he nodded again.

"You'll be there," he pointed out.

"Yes I will," she gave him a smile.

THE END

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><p><strong><strong>AN: This is a one-shot ficlet, which means that signing up for story alert will not bring you any alerts.  
><strong>**In the event of a sequel, the story will be separate from this one. And as chapter stories go, they are  
><strong>******always clearly indicated as such [ex: "Days 204-210" in the summary] Thank you!********


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